I wanted to write a quick little post to let you in on my thoughts about blogging…
This was prompted by some not-so-nice things I read about myself and my family and this blog yesterday. At first I was upset. I felt misunderstood and definitely hurt. But, then I decided that I can’t please everyone, so I’m not going to try. In the words of my wise friend John:
“Some people are just seagulls: They fly in, s*** on your site, and fly away. Don’t pay ’em any attention.”
That made me laugh when I was feeling a little sorry for myself yesterday afternoon. A lot of the comments were about the direction that this blog has taken since my blog turned into a career and I wanted to clear the air a bit and share my heart with you all. I also wanted this to be a disclosure of sorts since some of you are new here and may not know my blog from the early days. This is where I came from and where I’m going…
I started blogging nearly four years ago. Craig and I were newly(‘ish)weds at the time and I was having so much fun making our house a home – decorating, cooking, hostessing – that I felt inspired to start a blog. I read a few blogs at the time, but mostly I just wanted to have a place to store my inspiration and to document the projects I was doing around our house. This was my very first post a million years ago.
Back then I didn’t even really know blogs were a “thing”. I didn’t know you could make money from a blog and I didn’t realize just how large my community of fellow bloggers would become. I still remember the very first time a stranger (we later became friends!) left me a comment. I was elated, if not a little confused. I remember going to tell Craig, “Someone left me a comment on my blog today! Someone I don’t even know!”. And that was the beginning of something that was so much more than what I ever imagined.
So many of my closet friendships are a result of blogging. My career is a result of blogging. And a big part of my identity is tied to it. I blog because I love it. I blog because it makes me feel connected. I blog because it gives me an outlet: to vent, create or just be.
Now here comes the disclosure part – a few things you should know:
1. Sometimes I blog for love. Sometimes I blog for money. But, I’ll always be honest.
While I still do love blogging, the fact is I also get paid to do this. As such, there will sometimes be sponsored posts on this blog. I will let you know when a product has been given to us or when I am being paid to write about a product, but I will always be truthful in sharing my opinions concerning said products. I get approached to share things often, but I only say yes to things that I truly like and/or use or that I think will be relevant or interesting to you guys.
Also, while this is my primary blog, I also write for Babble and Disney and as a contracted writer I have real deadlines, post minimums and traffic quotas. I typically write anywhere from 8-10 blog posts a week, not including the posts I write here or the videos I make. The schedule can be a little daunting to balance sometimes (especially with a toddler around) and as such I have to prioritize and my contracted work has to come first. I try really hard to still make sure that my presence here is strong though, because this blog really is my first love.
2. You’re not always getting the full story.
I keep myself pretty open and honest on this blog, but I don’t share everything, because well…the internet is forever and not every story is mine alone to share. Consider this blog a highlight reel, or a “best of” type of thing. Yes, I try to bring you doses of reality too, but no one wants to hear only downer moments. Plus, posts detailing the back and forth commentary of my husband and I bickering at each other aren’t really all that interesting. Because of this you may get the idea that my life is 24/7 sunshine and roses, but I want to assure you that that is not the case. I really do have a very blessed life, but we deal with dirty laundry and snotty noses and the occasional name-calling from time to time too.
3. I can only share what I know.
Sometimes people get upset when I write posts that make it seem like I’m an expert on one thing or another (this post is a good example). I just want to set the record straight that whenever I share information about marriage or parenting or birth or health or whatever…I am sharing my personal experiences and what works for me and my family. Everyone is different and has different needs/wants/challenges, so I don’t expect my tips and suggestions to work for everyone. In the words of the wise Ron Burgundy, “If you like it, you can take it, if you don’t, send it right back.” I also don’t expect my content to be for everyone. If you don’t like kids? This site probably won’t be your cup of tea. This is a lifestyle blog and being a mom is a big part of my lifestyle currently. Does that mean being a mom is the only thing I have going in my life? Absolutely not. But, I love my kid so I’m going to talk about her. Maybe in another year I’ll be bored of her and we can just talk about cute shoes (unlikely, though we can still talk shoes…), but until then this is who I am and what is important to me and I hope you’ll understand that.
4. I am so thankful.
Professional blogging isn’t something that I set out to achieve, but I would be lying if I told you it wasn’t amazing getting paid to do what I love. I want you all to know that I feel so blessed be able to write my heart out every day and to have lovely readers like you actually take pause in their day to read the words I share. Sometimes it blows my mind that people actually even care, but I’m so thankful that you do. It is because you read my posts that I am able to work from home and spend so much time with my daughter. Unknowingly, by clicking on my posts both here and at Babble and Disney, you all have given me such a wonderful, priceless gift and you didn’t even know it. So, thank you. Truly.
Let me know if you have any other questions. I just wanted to share what was on my heart today.
Lots of bloggy love,
Lauren
you don’t owe any of your readers an explanation or a nice little post on how your blog has evolved. (let’s be honest. changing, growth and evolving are all good things!) if someone doesn’t like it, they don’t have to read it. simple as that. i’m sorry people were so rude and hurtful, but i want you to know i believe those people are few and far between. there’s a lot of us who adore the way you write and your blog.
People are lame and your friend is right, screw the negativity. Our lives change it’s inevitable. At one point you did it all for fun and now you have the opportunity to make some money, so…why the hell not?! I’m happy for you and for your family that you get to do this because being given the opportunity to be at home with Fern is priceless, but to be doing something you actually enjoy well that’s just great for everyone involved. Who gets to say they don’t actually punch a time clock, get to be with their kid all day, make money, AND are doing something they love all at once? You’re awesome and I am always stoked to see your posts. I may be bias because I am in the same season of life with a 15month old and all that jazz, but I definitely think I’d still read regardless because you’re a good writer and you make me laugh. 😉
Aren’t jealous people just a kick in the pants? Its really sad to see members of the same community try to tear each other down. I never really understand why people keep reading something just to nitpick and criticize it…not sure what it must be like to have that kind of useless, free time available…Anyway, I came over many months back after reading a Pinterest post of a Babble article about dressing babies (I have a 7 month old girl and she doesn’t know it, but Fern is her style idol!), and I fell in love with your stuff, so I’m here and on Instagram with you and I say just keep being you, I’d only complain if you stopped!
Great post. My new saying is – “Someone will always judge”. Put into context, I’ve just realized that whether I’m doing something right or wrong as a mom, wife, professional etc – someone will always judge me. So let them judge and think they know everything about you.As long as you’re happy nothing else matters.
Aww, Lauren! I’ve seen your blog transition a little bit too, and I think like most people, I’m happy/excited/jealous for you. (I say, “jealous,” because what you get to do is really cool, and sometimes I want to quit med. school and go to Disney World and then I’m screaming at the computer screen, “Take MEEEE, Lauren! I want to go!”) Seriously, though, God has blessed you by allowing you to make money from your blog, while you’re still doing what you do best–being a mom to Fern and wife to Craig. And, let’s be honest, the REASON that you have sponsorships is because you’re a great writer and document your life in a way that is appealing to your readers. Most of us are coming here to hear about Fern and what you’re learning as a new parent. I’m not married, and I don’t have kids, so that should say something about your gift for blogging! You never make your posts sound like you’re trying to sell something, and your humble enthusiasm is evident in your sponsored AND non-sponsored posts. I’m sure the haters wish they could say the same about their own blogs, but in my experience, those people don’t even have blogs. They’re just weird, angry people with a freakish amount of free time to troll the internet and leave ragey comments. So, carry on, dear. Haters still gonna hate, but the rest of us will keep reading.
great post – i think people often forget that bloggers are actual people with actual feelings beyond the screen. I honestly think if you wouldn’t say it in person, don’t say it with your fingers.
Sometimes we feel safer behind the screen but if there is a risk of hurting someone you should never hit publish.
I was just talking about your blog with a friend this week & we both agreed that we were very proud/impressed with you & how your blog has taken off! You’re doing an impressive job. So keep it up & know you have a lot of us rooting for you 😉
Thanks Lauren, for doing what you do. As a new mom, it’s reassuring to know you’re going through some of the same things I am and you & your blog inspired me to raise my son Montessori-style and we love it! Thank you!
Thanks Lauren, for doing what you do. As a new mom, it’s reassuring to know I’m going through some of the same things you’re going through. Reading your blog has inspired my family to raise our son Montessori-style and we love it! So, thanks, and please keep writing!
Thanks for being honest! I would love more insightful posts like this about your blog as a career; if you sought out advertising, if/how you promoted your blog in the beginning, and statistics along the lines of traffic, sponsors, etc needed to make a sustainable career as a blogger! Love your blog, especially as a fellow PDX mama!
Cheers,
Kirsten
http://babyproof.blogspot.com/
i don’t understand people who post blog hate…is it so hard to simply move on? you have such a sincere authenticity about you…can’t believe someone would ever say something against you!
I can’t remember how I found your blog but I love your style, your perspective and although I don’t know you – I feel like we have really similar styles of parenting, marriage – and actual style. Randomly, I wrote a post yesterday about Why I Blog because I sometimes question why I keep going. I have a very small group of readers and haven’t taken the time or energy to seek out other readers (sponsor, guest post, etc). Bloggers big and small deal with insecurities and I’m sorry that with your increased traffic comes idiot readers. I’m sure everyone can thing of a million things to do before leaving a negative comment on a blog. Why these people don’t X out and move on is always crazy to me. You’re beautiful and have a wonderful family and profession. Let those shitting seagulls be unhappy while you continue to shine!
I hate that people made you feel bad. On many of the blogs I read there’s been one of these “apology/explanation” posts after someone writes something negative. Mostly about sponsored posts. I think that if you can turn blogging into a money maker that is wonderful. Also it is a gift for you to share so much of your life with people who aren’t paying to read your words. Keep it up and remember you never need to explain yourself. If they don’t like what you write they can choose not to read it.
Lovely post, friend. People have said and probably will say mean things about your blog (and my blog and every one else’s blog) and that doesn’t mean you should stop doing what you love just because people are punks.
I’m glad you don’t let it affect you too much. Sometimes it hurts, but keep your head up and know that they aren’t the majority – not even close – and that some people just get their kicks from saying nasty things on people’s websites. Rude, weird, sad. I think it’s super lame, and honestly feel kind of bad that that’s how they feel better about themselves or relieved that they’ve “vented” some nasty comment on your blog. Whatever.
Your site is awesome, you are awesome, the direction you’ve taken with “the little things” is awesome, and I’ll be a fan of you whatever you do. Keep blogging friend! You’re still my fave : )
loved this lauren! you’ve accomplished so much, don’t let anyone make you feel weird about that.
p.s. lets get together soon!
ummmm, i’m sorry, but i just got done looking at your disney world pictures and GOOD FOR YOU that you’ve found such a wonderful career and can provide such fun things for your family! b***es be nasty.
i had read this post first before i looked at those photos, and i was tearing up at all those awesome moments between your parents and your sweet baby. that is so what it’s all about!!!
cheers for getting to do what you love, care for your family, and leave some beauty out in the world. that’s why i read your stuff and follow you on pinterest- you have an eye for beauty, and you are so positive. you deserve every second of your success. we all know you work hard.
p.s. i’m a stranger. hope this isn’t weird.
It is to bad that you are having to experience negativity for your blog!! I love it I share it with friends that are soon to be parents, with my husband and my sister!
I know it’s easier said than done to not let things get to you, but Haters are always going to hate no matter what. It’s unfortunate and I also have a hard time with mean/jealous people, but You can’t let them win!! Your blog is awesome and every time I read it I wish we were real friends!! Haha! Im new to blogging and hope that a rude/mean comment doesn’t slow me/us down!!
I love your blog!! I am so happy that I found it. It really has helped me in so many ways. I would love to have your job and it’s inspiring that you write for 3 blogs and you’re a mom and a wife etc. I think people who write mean things about you must live with anger in their hearts. And I feel sorry for them and anyone around them. You are one of those people that I’ve stumbled upon on the internet and wish i met at a mom to mom sale or mommy and me yoga instead. Who wouldn’t like you, seriously?? As moms, we need to be more supportive of each other and it looks like many people do support you already. I look forward to reading your future blog posts and appreciate you putting yourself out there and sharing your experiences with us!
Your blog is awesome!! Every time I read it, I wish we were real friends!! Haha! So dont pay attention to the haters because you cannot please them! I am new to blogging and a new mom, and the fact that you can handle both and get paid is Fantastic!! Keep on!!
Oh, Lauren!
I’m so sorry the haters (did I really just say that!?) have gotten to your blog. That is the worst.
You are wonderful at everything you do. Don’t change to please other people. We (well, most of us) love your blog just as it is!
Dude people are effing crazy (excuse my semi-french). This makes me so angry…why the heck do they read if they don’t like the content? In the wise words of Thumper “if you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all.” I’m sad that they felt the need to do this…you are amazing for juggling these blogs and I’m always amazed at how you’ve transitioned and adapted over the years. What you are doing is not for the weary and more power to ya to be able to do something you love while contributing monetarily to your family. I love it and I love YOU and don’t let the haters get you down girl! If people are going to hate then they gotta mess with me (insert fist emoji here) 😉 (okay that might be my pain meds speaking, but still)
It’s only natural for your contet to shift with what is going on with your life HELLO IT’S A PERSONAL BLOG! You can’t talk about how to style freakin chambray shirts for the rest of your life…in fact thank you for not, I quite enjoy posts about your cute little family and products you love. KEEP EM COMING! 🙂
Hi Lauren,
I saw a link to this on Facebook. I’ll be honest, I haven’t kept up with your blog lately like I used to, but that’s because I took a very full-time job this year, and can’t even keep up with my own blog or my sister’s blog these days. I remember when you first contacted me about sponsorship, which was how I discovered your blog (years ago!). I always loved following your posts, your style, your achievements, and milestones. I liked that you always seemed genuine and authentic. I think you are genuinely a great person and a great blogger.
I have no idea what this person said about you, but I know that any intelligent person who can use their critical thinking skills (like at a minimum level) knows that a for-profit blog needs ads to survive. This is something I’ve struggled with as an Etsy shop owner. How do I maintain my sense of what is ethical, what’s classy, and what’s “me” while still being able to profit from doing something I love? I think it’s definitely possible. You can find a way to be creative, genuine, and still make money. That is the beauty of blogging, Etsy, writing, art, etc. In short, you are doing an amazing job.
Haters are great. They challenge you, they force you to reevaluate, they make you stronger! As others have said, people appreciate the fact that you have evolved. Maybe the problem is that others have not 🙂
xoxo,
Courtney
I find it pretty sad when someone wants to dump on someone else, especially when it comes to blogging. You’re right, people don’t know the whole story and who do they think they are to shoot negativity at you?
I, for one, love your blog and I know you’re an awesome person. If people want to hate on you, they obviously have their own issues and are just trying to bring you down to their level. Don’t let them. You’re way to amazing for that!
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Enjoy checking out your blog, I especially like the “What Fern Wore’s” from the affordable places, helps an ordinary SAHM on a budget find ways to dress her kids cute. Keep up the good work and thanks for the inspiration.
Aw, Lauren, I’m really sorry for the nasty things you had to read. I’m proud of you for standing firm in who you are and for not lashing out. Chin up, sweetheart. I’ glad you get to do what you love.
Be proud that your blog turned into a career. It is sort of like parenting …. if your children love you everyday you aren’t doing it right. If you can do something that you love and get paid for it you have achieved the Holy Grail! Well done.
I am sorry that you got some nasty comments the other day. I hope that you deleted them very quickly. I really enjoy reading your blog and I especially love the posts that you write about Fern or anything related to photography. Thank you for sharing a snapshot of your life with us.
It sounds like people are jealous of your success and have nothing better to do than be nasty. How sad for them. You work hard and are really talented and should be proud of your accomplishments. Don’t let some losers take away the fact that most people think you are really awesome.
Hi, I read your blog like every week. Your humoristic style is witty, keep up the good work!
Thank you so much. That means a lot!