Hey Guys…
Just wanted to pop by with a quick link to a Good Morning America interview I did a few months back.
I’ve been interviewed by them a couple of times now, but I was really nervous about this one, since the topic was on “having a favorite child”. They contacted me after reading a piece I wrote over at Babble: “I Don’t Feel Guilty For Having a Favorite Child” and my first inclination was to just say no. From past experience, I have learned that sometimes TV editing can shine a pretty negative light on a person. The goal is to get people engaged and talking and when the topic is polarizing, so much the better. I was really worried that I wasn’t going to be able to get my point across clearly and that it was going to seem like I didn’t love both of my children. After seeing the interview though, I was actually really happy with how it turned out. I don’t feel like it was sensationalized like it definitely could’ve been, and I feel like my thoughts came across pretty clearly…or at least I hope!
Here’s the video if you care to take a look! Happy Tuesday friends!
(P.S. In case the video isn’t working, here’s a link to it as well)
I believe that it is an ever evolving thing. As is all love. One of my favorite quotes about this I heard from a movie, though I cannot for the life of me remember which movie. ‘My favorite child is whomever needs me the most in that moment’. I feel very much the same. There is a favorite. But it’s not from a lack of love for the others.
Very well said. Relationships really are ever changing. It’s silly to think our relationships with individual children would be an exception. I loved that you made reference to simply knowing your daughter longer. As my husband and I prepare for baby girl #2 (with baby girl #1 now only 14 mos old), I am haunted with concerns of comparisons, favoritism, and really anything/everything else. But I know my heart will be full, as I’m sure yours is, with our individual, wonderful and challenging little humans. 🙂
I think it came out totally great! And although the viewer poll shows otherwise, I think your situation (and the way it was presented in the “it could change” manner) didn’t come off as polarizing whatsoever. Great job, Mama!
You are so cute!!! And cool lol:)
I don’t know you personally, but I feel proud of you (or for you, maybe) for being the bigger person in agreeing to this interview. The way they portrayed you & the other blogger moms previously was upsetting. I’m glad this wasn’t as skewed. Thumbs up all around.
man the comments on that other thread are vicious! I totally know what you mean though. I have kids about the same age as you and I def feel closer to my daughter since I’m not a baby person either. To be honest my love for my daughter really started taking hold once she was a toddler and I think the same will happen with my son!
@Kim – Yeah. I’ve definitely learned not to read comments. If it’s not going to make my life better, than why bother? I don’t have time for negativity. People always seem to get riled up over things that are contrary to their personal truth and world view. Just because someone experiences someone a different way than I do, does not make them a monster. It just means they have had a different experience than I have. I totally agree with you about the toddler thing too. I love me some talking babies…makes a world of difference in my opinion. That interview took place over 2 months ago too and since then I’ve definitely had more time to bond with my son. He’s getting so fun and beginning to leave the baby stage is really helping :).
I don’t expect you to allow this thread on your site because you mentioned here that you are not reading the negative comments “so why bother”. I am also underwhelmed by the few comments of support that I do see here. Doesn’t that tell you something? I have to disagree with you—I think a little does of reality and social norms COULD help you to change your view and eventually help your son. I am a mother of four sons and I could never imagine having a favorite much less proclaiming it!
I want to speak for your son who will someday see this interview and realize that his mom- the woman he cherishes and trusts most in this entire world, went on television to say that his sister is the “favorite”. I am not sure what your issue is—maybe you were an only child, the least favorite of your family or so self absorbed that you disregard how your actions will affect your son but my heart aches for your son and his future!
BTW–I will be petitioning GMA to not utilize you on any more of their interviews.
Best of luck-
@Seirra – I am more than fine with people respectfully objecting to the things I write and/or say. You are definitely entitled to your feelings. I have no interest in debating your feelings with you because I can’t, but I will say that I love both of my children equally. I may feel more bonded with my daughter at the moment, but that is changing every day as I get to know my son more and more. I think it’s wonderful that you never had conflicting feelings concerning your four boys, but for me bonding with my children as babies has always been a challenge. I’ve never been a “baby person” and that is my truth. It is obviously a different truth than what you have experienced, but I don’t believe that it makes me a monster or a terrible mom. As someone who likely only came to my site after seeing my GMA interview, you are viewing this piece in a vacuum, separate from my other written work, so you don’t know me or my heart. That’s OK. You are more than welcome to leave your comments and petition GMA to ban me (Though clearly you don’t know very much about television if you don’t realize that controversial topics are what they want. If it’s not going to get people talking – good or bad – then what’s the point?). This is not my first rodeo and even though I am still a real person with real feelings and negative comments never feel great, I do have a pretty thick skin when it comes to things like this. You are not the first of your kind and you certainly won’t be the last.
Wow judgy much! I don’t know Lauren personally, but I have been reading her blog (for long than you Sierra apparently!) Now, I’ve read similar blog posts by other people before, and in the past the topic has sometimes made me cringe a little thinking of what their child will feel one day reading it. So I get that response! But what it also tells me is that this is a common feeling for parents to have from time to time! The whole point of writing and reading parenting blogs is to make people feel a little less alone in this… isn’t it? And if seeing this helps someone know that their feelings don’t make them a bad parent, and that other mom’s have felt like this too, well then that is great! Full disclosure, my second child isn’t born yet, but if I do find myself feeling like this a few months into our new baby’s life, maybe having seen these kinds of posts will help me realize that it is normal and ok to feel this way at some times! And also having read this blog regularly over the past few years…I’m sure that once Lauren’s son is at an age where he is capable of digging up old tv interviews online, he will also have read and experienced years of evidence of her love and acceptance of him.
I don’t feel like you read the whole post. She said at the moment she is more bonded with her daughter, clearly so seeing as she’s had 3 years with her and only months with her son. She stated that she loves her children equally but connects differently. Maybe you should read it again with your eyes open instead of picking out pieces taken out of context.
Thank you for your honesty. There is definitely a lot of bashing about it elsewhere, but in my opinion all of the women who’ve bashed have been through the same thing but are to proud and ashamed to say it. I have one child right now and he’s 10 months old. We are talking about baby number two and this topic has been at the top of my fear chart. I love my son so much that I’m afraid it can’t be shared. Everything you said is dead on. He made me a mama, he is my little adventure buddy, he is my prime focus. I think women like me need to read this so they can stop feeling ashamed. It’s natural to have favorites and it in no way makes you a bad parent. So thank you again for being real!
-Renee