The Little Things I Want To Remember

Motherhood goes by so fast you guys.

I mean, of course everyone always told me as much before I became a mom and they especially told me when I had tiny babies, but usually I just brushed those comments off, because “Yeah right little old lady at the grocery store. Do you have any idea how ridiculously long this day has been or how many dirty diapers and tantrums I’ve had to attend to?! This is moving along at a snail’s pace!” 

But then it happens as they always said it would. I stopped paying attention for two seconds and then I turned around and my daughter is a full blown kid and my baby looks like a two-year-old. What? When did that even happen? Where are my babies?

Sometimes I get a bit nostalgic for my kids and their baby days. I miss their sweet baby smell and their sweet baby noises and those teeny, tiny baby socks they used to wear. The socks you guys. I found some the other day while purging Clive’s closet and I teared up over the fact that my baby is totally not even a baby anymore. Nostalgia does weird things to you. And then I try to remember all the details of my children’s babyhoods and the details are fuzzy. What noises did Fern used to make when she was excited? What was that funny word she could never pronounce? When did Clive’s hair get that blonde? I honestly can’t remember.

Sometimes in the midst of the chaos that is motherhood, I forget to stop and look around and take notice of the important things…the things I will want to remember someday. So today I am doing just that. Taking note of the little things I want to remember about my sweet Fern and Clive.

My dear, sweet Fern, I always want to remember…

– The way you pronounce almost every word correctly, but still say “lellow” instead of “yellow”.

– The way you love a good sweet. I’m pretty sure we could bribe you to do just about anything with the lure of a cupcake or cookie.

– The way you want to listen to music all day, everyday. It’s literally one of the very first things you ask for upon waking. “Mama, turn on some music!”

– The way you will only dance in this certain spot in the kitchen. This little space has become your very own stage and you get so annoyed when Clive wants to play there while you’re twirling.

 

– The smell of your sweaty curls when you wake up from a particularly toasty nap. It sounds strange, it’s like the warmth of sleep bakes up the delicious smell of baby soap and your own natural scent into something absolutely heavenly. I truly wish I could bottle this, because I know in a few more years, you aren’t going to be so keen on having your weirdo mom sniffing your hair.

– The way you love to shop. If I were to ask where you wanted to go on a date today, I’m almost certain at least part of our date would be spent at Target. You love the place and you love to visit all the dollies.

– The way you always love to get out of the house and do something. “Mama, what are we going to do today? Are we going to have an abenture” Your sense of adventure is my favorite.

 

– The fact that you almost always refer to Clive as “Clivey Clarke”.

 

– Your prayers. You used to always pray “Thank you Jesus for Clivey and that he’s soooo cute!”, but recently you have made a foray into other prayers. Your M.O. is “Thank you Jesus for dying on the cross for our sins and thank you for our family”.

– The way you always need a kiss on every single owie and instantly it’s better. You are quickly teaching Clive your ways.

– Your love for having your picture taken, though only on your own terms. Many times throughout the day you’ll say, “Mama, take my picture!” while you’re playing or engaging in a particular activity. I am always happy to be the historian of your life.

– Your love of water. You are such a little fish!

– The way you stop randomly throughout the day to tell me you love me.

– The way I always tell you that “You’re my best girl.” and you always respond “And you’re my best girl.”

– The way you always look out for your brother and want him to be included. The other day I asked if maybe sometime you would want to have a girl’s night and we could send Clive to have a sleepover at Grandma’s house and we could go on a date and watch movies and eat popcorn. Your response was, “OK. That sounds fun. And then, Clivey Clarke can come on our date with us too!” I tried to explain that a girl’s date would be just us, but you were insistent that your little brother should be included. I love that about you.

 

 

My darling Clive, I always want to remember…

– The way you call me “Amma” instead of “Mama” half the time.

– The way you get so excited about socks and shoes. You love when I put yours on, but even more than that you love taking everyone else’s shoes off the rack and trying them on. Seeing you try to clomp around in Daddy’s basketball shoes always makes us laugh.

– The way you light up around animals. The wonder in your eyes when you see an animal always makes my heart swoon.

 

– Your early words. “Bah!” (ball). “Appah!” (apple…all day everyday). “Bob-uh!” (Bob Moore…Daddy’s boss at Bob’s Red Mill. You point him out on all the packaging and got so excited when you saw him in the flesh). “Bah-Bah!” (Baby). “Ow-ull!” (Owl). “Doh!” (Dog). “Shhhewww!” (Shoe – you say it with such intention). “Mo-uh!” (More. Used to signify anything you might possibly ever want).

– The way you adore your sister. The sun rises and sets with her. The first thing you do when you see her every morning is swoop in for a snuggle. She is your favorite person in all the world and she makes you laugh hysterically.

– The way you blow kisses and give kisses with a very emphatic “Mah!” sound.

– The way you try to snuggle absolute strangers. Yesterday during Fern’s ballet class you snuggled right up to an older ballerina waiting for her class to start and swooped in for a kiss!

– The sweet way you have with dolls and babies. You are so gentle and nurturing!

 

– Your fearlessness. You love to climb all the things and we have to hide all the stools and benches in the house, because you will inevitably find them and climb them.

– Your obsession with apples. You eat at least two a day and if ever you are grumpy, I just hand you one and your grumps melt away. You will occasionally eat them sliced, but for the most part you love to eat them whole, so I have taken to buying you your own small ones. You will carry around an apple for hours, munching on it sporadically and it’s so funny!

 

I know that as time marches on, these memories will get fuzzier, but they are my sweet treasures, just like these sweet children. They may exhaust me sometimes, but I am so thankful for them and that they are mine.