marriage: making it work #4.

*Note:  blogger is being stupid…hence all the weird spacing.  I’ve tried a million times to fix it.  Please bear with me…..

Today’s guest bloggers are…..drum roll please………. My parents Jeff and Ana Marie!  My parents have taught me that marriage will have its ups and downs, but it’s how you tackle the tough times that will make the good times that much sweeter.  I am so thankful to them for laying a strong foundation for their marriage that spilled over onto our whole family.  Here are some of their thoughts on marriage….









What’s your love story?













Our story is one that could be called a “love at first sight” story.  We met on June 25th, 1983.  I (Ana Marie) had heard about Jeff Schrader for a whole year prior to this meeting.  A mutual friend of ours (who by the way had a huge crush on me) kept telling me that I really needed to meet his friend Jeff Schrader.  I didn’t understand why he wanted me to meet him so badly.  Our college church group was going to the Griffith Park Observatory in California and Jeff was invited.  I heard a motorcycle coming up the church driveway, and our mutual friend said, “Jeff Schrader is here’ Jeff Schrader is here”!  All that I could thing was, oh brother!  Jeff pulled in to park his motorcycle in front of the bus.  He removed his helmet, and that’s when the sparks began to fly.  Our friend introduced us and the rest was history.  Eight months later we were married.  This past June we celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary at which time we were able to return to the observatory where we first met.  It was an amazing way to spend an anniversary.

Fill in the blank:
“The best thing about marriage is_________.”

Jeff:  My wife, and that she gets me (understands me).















Ana:  The best thing about marriage is that you don’t have to say goodnight anymore and go your separate ways, because you’re already home, and the best place to be is with the one you love.  The search for “the one”, your very best friend, and your soul mate is over and the journey begins.  You have someone who is always there to share your day with and your hopes and dreams. You have someone who you can trust to be honest with you even when that honesty might hurt.



Fill in the blank:


“The most challenging thing about marriage is_________.”









Jeff:  Giving up what I want in an effort to keep peace in the family.

Ana:  Remembering to die to your own self daily…in other words, putting your spouse’s needs above yours.



Fill in the blank:
“My favorite thing about my spouse is_________.”







Jeff:  She has an amazing compassion for others which I will never quite understand.  She genuinely cares more for others than she does for her self.  She lives her life one day at a time and sometimes one hour at a time.  Time doesn’t seem to matter to her.  If she’s on the phone with a troubled friend time seems to stand still.  For that moment the most important thing to her is being the best friend she can be.   She therefore makes something about herself that I desperately wish I could change, (being on time), and turns it into something that I would never dream of changing.

Ana:  He is a hard worker and tries to often put the needs of others above his own.  He has a great sense of humor and can always make me laugh.  I especially like when he tucks me in at the end of a hard day.  It might sound silly, but it’s a great feeling and it makes me feel safe.



What’s your secret to a happy
marriage and making it work?

We both believe strongly that although falling in love generally comes at you unexpected, a lasting love is a decision.  In a quest to live our lives happily ever after we have at times encountered various difficulties.  All marriages have difficult times and to think otherwise would be a fantasy.  The methods people use to work through these difficulties vary drastically from relationship to relationship.  And some couples even choose ending the marriage as a way to solve these difficulties.  The fact that we are more in love today than the day we got married would be a miracle if not for decisions we made each time difficulties arose.  Our marriage has always been supported by the one major decision which we agreed on prior to saying I do.  Together we decided to always be united in the commitment that divorce is absolutely not an option, and united in the commitment that we will always strive to keep God in the center of our relationship.  When you remove all of the other options the only choice that remains is to work it out.  We have also found that when you work things out together it tends to strengthen your love into an even stronger love that you could imagine.

Thanks Parents!

Comments

  1. wow! how inspirational!

    my fiance and i have had the ‘divorce is not an option’ discussion. it felt liberating.

    your parents sounds wonderful :0)

    i’m going to call my parents now and give them a long hug via the phone line!

  2. so sweet.

    i love the family picture at the bottom. 🙂

  3. Omg! Your parents seem soo amazing and like the greatest rolemodels!
    Man, just the way they spoke about each other. It’s beautiful that your dad had so much to say about your mom and visa versa.

    Lauren, you are one lucky lady!

    Thank you for sharing this beautiful love story with me.

    <3 Lex

  4. aw how sweet! Love the pictures of them and you look adorable!! What great parents you have!

  5. oh well if they aren’t just AWESOME i dont know the meaning of the word.

    xo

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